It's Okay, You Go

It's Okay, You Go....

Guess that the most famous line from Grey's Anatomy hehehe

Anyhoo, had my D&C or ERPOC yesterday. Basically means my womb has been cleaned.

Showed up at the hospital Emergency door sharply at 7am. Admission process was smooth. Already on the ward bed around 7.15.

Sakai-ing myself with the new surrounding, well it's a new hospital with very nice view ahahah.

I opted for 6 bedded room since it's a simple procedure. Apparently I was the only patient that day so I got that hugeeee room alll for myself. Privacy achieved!

After I settled down, 4 nurses came to explain the procedure then they prepared me for the drip tube (pardon me for my words.dunno the real medical term). Sakit wehhhhhh the jarum is like 3-4 cm huuu

Then around 8am, a nurse came to insert 2 pills down my hoo haa. to help to soften the cervix opening bla bla bla. I hate being 'seluk'. Seriously. Anyway, after a few minutes of embarassment being shoved with the pills while being watched by 2 other nurses, it's done.

An hour later I started to feel the period pain symptoms. Means the pills worked.

At 10am, I was pushed to the preparation area (again pardon the term). waited for almost 40minutes lying on the hard bed and freezing temperature. Period pain you cannot lie down on hard surface. sakit pinggang. I started to feel agitated.tossing on the bed.hahah one nurse noticed and explained to me my doctor would be late as there was an emergency with her other patient. ok la what to do right.

 

I was so bored that I pulled out the sensor from my finger so the machine made sound like i'm dead and put it back when the nurses turned their head.hahaha

Later the anesthetist came to do background checking before he put me to sleep.

 

A funny doctor. He cracked me so I could forget the discomfort for a while. I'm allergic to pain killer. I dunno which type so he asked some more and finally conclude that i might be allergic to aspirin because i kehnot take Panadol activefast. normal Panadol can. Could be aspirin. Then he started explaining about morphin bla bla bla which I couldnt help but replaying the Power Rangers song in my head the whole time till I passed out in the operation theater. Mighty morphin power rangersss!!!

 

  Anyway, 10.55AM finally I was brought to OT 1. The room damn cold i started coughing. the temperature ignited my asthma. but not for long. then the anesthetist did his magic and 5 seconds later i heard somebody called my name "Siti....Siti...."

 

The procedure's done! Took about 30mins only. Because I pengsan super early, didnt notice when I passed out even, the process felt like 5 seconds.miahaha

 

 

Sent back to the ward where B's waiting. super dizzy and tried to sleep but the nurses kept coming to check BP la, sent food, asked for condition or medication.

 

I was so hungry by then (fasted since midnight) so I asked when can i eat. The nurse said try to drink water first if you dont vomit you can eat. So I drank a glass of water, no sign of puking, quickly gobbled the food.

I dont want to spend the night at the ward so I need to get strong again pronto!

Story short, my doctor came about 3.30 and I convinced her I'm well enough to go home. She said ok!

bla bla bla by 5.30 B and I were heading home. h

Confinement started yesterday.

I'm so touched with all the encouragement received from my colleagues, friends and family. Everyone was sending me messages, telling me to be strong, words of strength even my contractor for Kitchen cabinet.hahahaah

Honestly, I am super fine. I've had my sad moment losing this one few weeks back when I was first told by doctor that the baby's size is too small for its size. By then I already knew I had lost it so I am fine, really. 

Dreams

At the end of April, I dreamed of getting pregnant.

In that dream I just found out I was pregnant with another child.

Once it happened, when a few days  the UPT test showed double lines.

Not sure to be ecstatic or what because I totally didn't expect to conceive THAT fast, almost 2 months after I removed implanon and my period cycle was still unstable.

Anyhoo, that's rezki.

A week after that, there was a gush of water coming out from my down under. Went to see a doctor but the doc didn't have the answer. A lot of senior colleagues assured me it was nothing to be worried about.

The water came 3times. Clear, odorless liquid. By the 3rd time it happened, I was having a bad cough. And this doctor, with a stern voice told me I should've gone to the hospital. I did go. But the O&G doctor was away. It was Friday.

That night I had another dream. I lost the baby. I didn't see the baby but I dreamed of having a miscarriage with the blood and all.

Waited till Monday, after work B and I headed to the new hospital in Melaka. A female O&G who used to work with Melaka General Hospital. She's nice and a cool doctor. Hehe

Anyhow, the scan was worrying. At least to me. The size didn't match the week I was supposed to be. I was in week 9 where the heartbeats should be easy to detect. There was a small dot, about 1.3cm (week 9 should be around 3cm) and there was nothing inside the circle. I compare the size to Minmin's scan at 9th week. He already showed hands at that age but this baby, nothing. dr Hayati set another appointment the following week to see the progress.

Went home, did what most of us like to do, google About our condition, trying to match the symptoms with those  found on the Internet and scared the hell out of our lives.hahahahaha don't lie.

Googled about blighteD ovum and trying to sink with the reality.

Maybe I thought too much about it, I had another miscarriage dream that night.

I told B the next day, sort of preparing him mentally about what's coming our way coz based on my google research, there was almost zero hope for blighted ovum.

Sooooooo another week passed. Which is today.

I started having spotting down under since yesterday (Sunday) and today the bleeding started. Ok it sounds scary and like I'm dying but it's just bleeding and till now I'm just having regular cramps. Nothing serious.

Anyhow, today's appointment has confirmed that the ovum is not progressing

. And the scan shows that the area around the circle has started to bleed. Which means no baby. Dr Hayati sets a DNC (dunno what it stands for but it is to clean the womb so nothing unnecessary remains in there which could lead to serious bleeding and hard to get pregnant bla bla bla.

The process will be tomorrow. I'm a chicken when it comes to pain. Serious chicken. I just hope 

tomorrow will go fast. I yizzzzz scared with anything to do with my down under.hahahahaahahah

Please pray for me.