This morning I woke up at 4am. After the usual pumping routine, it was time to fill the bottles with ebm enough till I get home. I was ok till I realized one of the storage bags was leaking and it contained 6oz of ebm. I had to throw it away.
I was angry at myself. 6oz of sweat and tears wasted just like that.
And that's how I started my day, grumpy, whiny and angry.
It was a long day for me today. After school, I lepak-ed at the surau till 2pm then headed to Jusco for lunch and jalan-jalan. 4pm, I was already at the hockey stadium. I was on duty for BBSM with the students. The game ended at 6.35pm. So you guess what time I reached home?
7.25pm.
I thought Min would have been sleeping..but he wasnt. I guess he waited for me to lull him to sleep.
So sweet this boy.
It took longer than usual to make him sleep. He wanted to be cuddled longer before I could put him in his cot. While he was falling asleep,I stared at him under dimmed light. I listened to him breathing. I saw his chest breathing in and out the oxygen. I felt his body thrusting towards mine.
That my dear readers, a feeling that cannot be described by words. All the stress, the loneliness, the anger were swept away just like that.
Then all the memory since he was born came back like a rolling advertisement.
Since born, Abdul Muhaimin is afterall a good baby. He is a happy and easy to entertain. He's not fussy even when he was sick. Only he cant tolerate hunger that well =)
I should be grateful. All the tests from God since I was pregnant with him, the absent of my husband most of the time, the mental and psychological torture of being in a long distance relationship, the loneliness, the pain of seeing other couple together,
Allah gives me the best baby ever. At least this one thing that not all parents can have is given to me.
Abdul Muhaimin, you are my strength. Fight with mommy ok =)
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