Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Baby Blues

When I was still naive about pregnancy and birth, I always thought they were fun. I always thought to hold your baby after hours of struggling with contractions was the happy ending. I always thought that a woman would be super happy holding the bundle of joy.

I was happy too till what I might call as baby blues, arrived. Quote from American pregnancy Association (wahhh gitu cam buat thesis..haha)
Mood swings after the birth of a baby are not uncommon. While the “baby blues” are the least severe form of postpartum depression, it is important not to ignore the changes that are happening in your body. Many women feel confused about struggling with sadness after the joyous event of adding a new baby to the family and often don’t talk about it

I didnt know I was having baby blues till I googled about it few days ago and thought of sharing it here. I was a bit depressed after we came home from the hospital. Juggling between the baby, the surgery pain, the discomfort, and changed of daily routine and oh the hormones (i just love to blame the hormones hehe)made that first two weeks miserable for me.

I cried constantly especially after the 4th day up to a week. I cried when there's no milk after pumping, I cried when Muhaimin refused me, I cried when I saw my belly, I cried when Muhaimin cried at night, I cried when I was in pain.

Not only tears, I was very moody also. Kesian my hubby. He had to be patient taking care of two babies.hoho There was one time when I felt everything was too overwhelmed for me I refused to hold Muhaimin. I didnt want to look at him. I didnt want to hear him at all. I let B and my mom handled everything. I didnt tell B initially but after a day, I confessed and broke down. A mommy is supposed to love the newborn unconditionally, but why did I feel that way? I even became grumpy when B paid more attention to Muhaimin than me. Pfftt~ what a drama-mommy.

Anyhoo, I had all the symptoms of baby blues stated in the website.
Symptoms of “baby blues” include:
  • Weepiness or crying for no apparent reason
  • Impatience
  • Irritability
  • Restlessness
  • Anxiety
  • Fatigue
  • Insomnia (even when the baby is sleeping)
  • Sadness
  • Mood changes
  • Poor concentration
I think the only way to get over baby blues is support. I have a very supportive husband. When I told B I had no feeling towards Muhaimin as a mom should have, he didnt judge me. He keeps encouraging, giving advices and words of wisdom and told me all these would pass. And every free time we had we would talk about our feelings even for 5 minutes. No judge. and that helps. A lot. By the end of week 2, I was feeling more of myself. I started to feel happy again, though still tired.heheh

I believe if I didnt talk about how I feel, I would be so depressed till now. Alhamdulillah that I've passed the depressed moment. Now I cant let a day pass without gomol-ing my hero!

To all mommy-to-be, be prepared for things like this coz it will swing by unannounced.hehe be prepared mentally and physically to welcome your bundle of joy. Baby blues, if you ignore it could lead into postpartum depression, which is more severe. Talk to your husband,family and friend about how you feel. They will understand. And enjoy the new journey.hehe

Mommy loves you hero =))

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